Because oh my god I can just take off and fly. I... didn't know I needed that? But I needed that- it's an incredible feeling, when heights feel like opportunity and options rather than being scary. The firebending is cool? Well, kinda exactly the opposite, you know what I mean- but flying is everything.

I haven't met either of them yet, but I think I need to! We'll call ourselves The Talias? Hmm. That'll need some work, but I'm totally in for an all-Talia band.

I'm not sure how we haven't crossed paths before - I wouldn't say I'm in SIELU often, but I get called in for Grelvish consultations occasionally (don't laugh; I never meant to pick it up). Mostly I end up stuck talking to Ramwë, though.

So: greetings to you beneath the stars beyond Arda. I am Huinesoron, of the PPC, of Nargothrond before the Sudden Flame, of Tirion upon Túna in the days of bliss. I would be glad to make your acquaintance, and remember with you the Elder Days of the world.

Provided we don't have to do it in thrice-detested Original Quendian.

Huinesoron

((... we should totally write a First Age Get-Together. Excuse me while I go off for about an hour to see how many agents would show up...

Okay, so Naergondir, Huinesoron, Dafydd, obviously. Duros Black used to live in Gondolin. Hawthorne is a Maglor replacement. Kevin Talathion comes from southern Beleriand. And... that seems to be it? Our dwarves are from later, Vemi was from much earlier, and I think all our Mannish types are from the Third Age, as is Jareth the Uruk-hai. Huh. ~hS))

Hera, of course, is far too good to do any work beyond carrying messages, and Ilwion is a bit... well, spoiled these days. Dafydd keeps talking about finding the kids a cat (I think he has some kind of kinship with them), but that bronze is all the feline anyone needs. He sunbathes as often as he can; I have to send Hera to badger him into pulling his weight when we actually need something.

It's good to hear Zeke doesn't take after his sire; the worlds need more helpful people!

C

Ninetwo: Frankly, ummm, this strikes me as deeply offensive - not just to our employers, who have spent much time, and effort, and, um, time, into creating as ideal of a work environment as they can, but to us employees - us, who place our trust, our hopes and dreams on the backs of our great leaders in the Janitorial Division management! To denigrate them would be to, by extension, denigrate us, and I refuse to do that!

Finch: 'It-s a justice we really bloody ought to have and, because of that fact, we never will ever have it. All these gits are whinging about "not being fired" and "job security" and "milking any form of miniscule payment out to survive to next week". You think you-ve it rough? Every day, all day, I-m out here dying, but that never strikes them, does it?!

Bingle: 'Oh, well, I suppose it could be a fun day out, couldn't it?'

Anne: 'We tried that once in the early days. I don't think there's many people left in JD who'll remember it. Everybody went on strike. It dissolved pretty fast when we realised we all lived in here, and that all the falling infrastructure and angry goops and gases would be going after us, too. I don't think I care so much about my own rights, anyway.'

Anne's Cat (written by Anne): 'My cat scratched out the word "union" and then ate the whole letter. Now she's spitting up shards of it into the rubbish bin. She hates all kinds of rights, especially human ones. I think she would be inherently against this.'

Firstly, it is Sir Cornell. Secondly, for what purpose would I do that? I can barely find the blasted office, much less give instructions to chalklings so that they get there. The way this place works, I have to sleep in the corridors most of the time. The indignity of it. Me, a scholar of rithmatics forced to sleep in the hallways like some vagabond. Humph.

Though you can keep calling me 'monsieur,' if you like. I'm kind of enjoying it.

...in fact, maybe you'd like to keep calling me 'monsieur' over drinks...?

Seriously?

Then again, I've seen the latest report. You're going to twist what I say no matter what...

Well, then. Yes. I am absolutely taking advantage of Zeb. Because that's apparently what I do, taking advantage of people like this, so obviously that's what's been happening with Zeb. I definitely didn't have a conversation with him three years ago about what exactly he could expect from me, and I've absolutely seduced him multiple times into the salacious art of baking pies and watching movies. He's definitely only with me because I've overwhelmed him or blackmailed him or something like that.

You know, considering this has been going on for three years, wouldn't someone like Dawn or, I don't know, the Aviator have put a stop to it by now if I really was taking advantage of Zeb? Assuming he wouldn't have done it himself? Sometimes you people just don't think.

-Jacques

Endor did not contain so many devices made of moving metal parts and surfaces which display information. This unfortunately necessitated the invention of words on our part, although in some cases we have simply borrowed the English term. However, describing them was less strange than learning to use them; for my hands, by then, were more accustomed to grip a blade than a device which even the crafters among the Noldor would not have thought to design. I will not deny their usefulness, but neither can I ignore the lack of grace in their shaping.

Culturally, it has been strange; but how could it not be so, when our kindred here are few and scattered? It is not so dissimilar, however, to some places in Endor, and so, though it is sometimes lonely, it is not unbearably unfamiliar.

And by "a little tied up," I mean I'm writing this from a mission where my clothing disguise involves something that looks a lot like a fishing net. Don't ask. Really--don't.

I can let you know when I'm back--rain check?

-Jacques

"Personally, I am quite fond of my own tree - an oak, if you cared to know - and he is quite fond of me. If I was forced to choose another, though... hmm... perhaps the olive tree? They are productive and full of meaning. Though the olive-bound Dryads I have had the dubious pleasure of meeting have all tended to be rather... ah... interesting to deal with."

"No, DAVD is not planning on taking over the PPC by assassinating the Flowers with an army of demonic badgers and replacing them with clones. I don't know where this rumor keeps coming from."

"The fact that you think I want to murder the Flowers and the agents who support them, or the fact that you think I'd be so sloppy about it that you'd be able to find out before the coup went down. I mean really."

"Are you accusing me of seduction to claim and keep my job? Because both of these individuals, viewed in the proper light, could be considered my bosses. Honestly - of all the probable rudenesses I could have possibly considered being asked to answer to during this whole affair - by which I mean the mailbox affair, thank you very much - this was certainly nowhere on the list! I expect nothing less than a full apology for this slight to my honor, sir, madam, or whichever alternative form of address you may personally prefer. Hmph!"

But then, diplomacy has never been my strong suit, so why not?

I suppose if I were to pick something I truly dislike, it would be summed up in one word: paladin. I can not abide moral busybodies poking about in the affairs of others. If I needed someone bleating in my ear to do my job I'd have stayed home.

However, in fairness to Larkus, he has thus far not unreasonably intruded on my business. For his sake I hope it stays that way.

Larkus: I try to find the good things about people more than the bad, but If you're gonna put me on the spot, I'll say this, he's overdue for an attitude adjustment. He's not the worst company I've had, but I think his powers have gone to his head a touch. Arrogant, you know? I get it, he's a mage, he's older than me, he thinks he knows the ropes, but he's liable to get us both killed if he doesn't learn how to work with a partner soon.

The Console's infernal howling aside, most of my furniture is presently four dimensional spaces away. Not exactly out of my reach, but I somewhat doubt the Flowers would accept me taking time off to retrieve my favorite armchair.

I cannot say I have any recommendations in this reality, but if you are willing to traverse planar boundaries, I know a lovely little shop in my home continuum. Run by a family of halflings, been in the business for twelve generations. Lovely people.

Because I'm not telling things of that caliber about my personal life.

And the nice award goes to participating to these Hunger Games things. Leading to being drafted for another session after of that thing, and if the DIA hadn't given me a warning about it, I'd still be searching the guys behind this to give them 'proper thanks'.

And as a runner up for the 'man up, that's part of the job' category... Missionning that Madoka trollfic. I didn't need pictures of middle schoolers doing this sort of things, I already have enough 'nice pictures' in my brain as it is. At least I can try to forget that one.

Being dropped in the badfic mess without a brief and the fireworks at the DoSAT when we got back take the cake by far. I heard some Techies are still keeping a grudge.

But if you're thinking... before, then I'd say that was about one year after learning about magic. Back then, we'd figured out the worst of the accidental hexing was behind us, with knowing how to avoid the worst of it now. I had came back home for a family movie night after a... special lesson with my master, so I was already tense. The movie was... Madagascar 2, just a nice little thing my little sister could enjoy too for us to watch. I'm relaxing... Then our phone begins ringing. It's ridiculious, but that's so unexpected it got me jumping out of my armchair... Straight out of my circle. Bye Bye TV. And since by that point I'm also feeling this is my fault and getting pretty frustrated at the relapse... Living room electronics follow by the time I'm getting it under control. I was feeling real bad by the time it was over.

Ilraen, god dammit, what did I tell you about talking to the Monitor?!

<They were only asking about Farilan! I did not say a single thing about you!>

That doesn't matter! You can't give these people anything, and you should know that by now!

And you should know you can't believe a word they say. We're done here. Bye.

In my experience, it pays to look at what people do, not only what they say. Farilan is... difficult, that is true. She is very intelligent and very prideful, which is not always a harmonious combination. However, this masks a charming curiosity and even innocence, I would say. She seeks to learn more about this strange multiverse and the strange beings in it, but to one raised in a culture such as ours, with very rigid expectations and rules for every occasion, they can be surprising, alarming, even disturbing. I am her guide through this bewildering array of strangeness. Although I am strange myself, I hope that she feels she can always rely on me, for anything.

Do you have any idea how long I've been trying to make that a thing? And like, I've razzed him about him and Jötun, because that whole thing is weird as hell and it's funny, but that ain't the problem. I think I could deal with it if it were, but nah. For someone with a bod that hot, the man is just weirdly cold. Jerk.

Also, that pic? Totally happened, but it didn't happen happen. And now you're gonna give it to me and tell me how you got it before I give you a nose job with my fist.

No. ∗turns to walk away, but has an idea∗ ∗turns back smooth as silk, and speaks as such∗ ... You see, you've got it backwards. I'm not stuck in there with him. He's stuck in there with me. ∗gives his most maniacal, crooked, one-eyed grin, creepy face shadowing and all∗

(( The Multiverse Monitor is gonna have its best edition ever after this thread. {X D ))

I live at home with my mom. I go to school at the Nursery. I like it, because all my friends are there and usually classes are fun. You have to know a lot of stuff in the PPC. We do a lot of spelling and grammar and writing work, which gets pretty boring, but canon classes are great! Sometimes we even get to go on field trips to the OFUs. It's not exactly the real thing, but it's pretty cool. Other places are so big and bright and colorful, not like HQ at all. The first time, it was a little bit like that one book, The Giver, which has a movie that's not very good. We did a paper on it last year. Wanna know what I said?

(( Please don't ask, I've never seen the movie and I have no idea. This kinda got away from me. {X D ))

We Sons didn't "sign on" with the ruinous powers out of hatred or spite. We acted as we did because we had no other choice. We were played, and by The Architect of Fate himself. If you stood in our place, I do not doubt you would feel the same.

All the knowledge I have gained did was provide further confidence in that assertion. Given the knowledge we had, we did as best we could.

I do not have a favorite portrayal as of yet.

Yeah, I figured it'd happen sooner or later. Talia got a double too. Just... fantastic.

I got this name from my IRC handle. Just stuck, for some reason. Sure, it's stupid, but every other nickname I got was worse.

((This is more or less how I got Thoth as a nick.

...It occurs to me that Dagger's name may have been unconsciously inspired by someone's username on another website. That person is nothing like him.))

I have more of these, and spend my days using them. I have a breath weapon. I exercise regularly.

...What's the expression? Ah, yes: Come on if you think you're hard enough.

I take walks sometimes. And I have been practicing on the firing range. Not to great.

I also like beating people at competitions involving flashing lights in a box and violence. C'mon, what's your game? Smash? Street Fighter? Quake? Warcraft/StarCraft? Civ? FreeSpace? Mortal Kombat? Name your game and time. I'll take you.

I mean, Thoth and Derik I can see. Those two are two stops shy of jumping into a bed together or something. Okay, not really, but the blatant and unintended homoeroticism is fun to mock.

But... I mean, I don't even go to Rudi's once a week, much less with Talia. Although she did buy me a beer once. It was after I finally beat her at Quake.

I won at Instagib. And as it turns out, Corona tastes terrible.

...Who claimed this, and what did they say?

Apologies, I merely need to know whom to... reward for their behavior.

In answer to your question, no. I presently have no romantic interests. I respect Derik, and we share a kinship, forged of a mutual respect and understanding. It seems some people are incapable of distinguishing this from romance. This is neither my fault nor my responsibility.

While it is true that the PPC is an easier place to live than... my prior accommodations, I do my best to maintain my strength and ability.

I do, however, doubt that Derik is a bleeding heart of any sort. And in my time with him, I haven't noticed any actively dripping physical wounds, either. I do not know any large and dangerous monsters who tend to throw fire on a regular basis, however. If I encounter a Pyrae, I shall have to ask them.

Tai-chi.

A well structured diet contributes to bodily heath, it is true. I would additionally suggest a rigorous training regimen, the implantation of artificial organs, the use of drugs and hypnosis to aid in the use of such, and several centuries of combat. The Adeptus Astartes has proven this strategy to be effective, provided you are one of the few males eligible.

If you are female or otherwise ineligible, earning the favor of the Blood God is, of course, an alternative. However, this is not a path I would recommend.

But I do know they exist in their own parallel kitchens. We sometimes leave each other notes, whenever our planes of reality overlap. My favorite pen buddy cook is Zurek the Tuskarr.

As for the other part, of COURSE I'm freaking out about it, why did you bring it up!? But.. for now one thing that's keeping me grounded to the kitchen is my desire to break the Cafeteria's Curse of Comedically Catastrophic Cuisine.

Definitely the S'cream-of-Spinach Soup. Some rookies plundered a whole bunch of food from the "Kids Next Door" continuum. And Grandma Stuffum's food tends to be even more risky than ours. But the spinach looked surprisingly nice... That was my mistake.

On a plus side, on that day I learned to appreciate Glopsnerch.

Probably with the same amount of shock I had when I learned the Doctor had fathered my child. And for the record, I'm pregnant again, this time with triplets, except I'm not sure if the children are Zeb's or the Detective's or Jacques', or maybe one of each.

F--k's sake.

This isn't some sort of trick to get me to confess why I love it, is it?

What, you expected more than that?

Fine.

I tried to stop another slave from escaping. Got too close when the implant in his chest was detonated. Lost my arm and my eye for bothering to try to save his life.

Dumbass.

You happy now?

I am dating a Jack replacement at the moment, though—Jacques Bonnefoy. We bake pies and dance around the kitchen together, and he's been teaching me how to sing, and I tell him stories about Pokémon battles. He's been wonderful. <3

No, but if you asked my sister, she'd probably say otherwise!

Unfortunately, it seems like the CADs exploding is a direct result of Rule of Funny. Us techs have tried everything we can think of: fireproofing, redundant systems, you name it. You can take a flamethrower to a CAD and it'll be fine after, but put it near someone too OOC and... kaboom. You just learn to accept you'll be repairing the damn things for the rest of your career.

Ilraen and I are merely acquaintances at best, and our relationship is strictly professional. He has been teaching me about the different species that live in the PPC, nothing more. And I'll thank you to stay out of our personal lives!

sinnin' around a fire 'n swappin' stories. Most people are hidin' two to a cave. 's lonely. Sure, there's the pub, but it's not the same, y'know?