Subject: Eh...
Author:
Posted on: 2010-09-02 01:21:00 UTC
Neshomeh summed up my feelings on this mission pretty well when she said "I didn't really get a sense of what was so wrong with the fic (other than turning someone into a naga)." Speaking as someone who's read Naga Eyes without the benefit of the 'Saltines and Sprite' MST treatment, I can say with authority that is not a problem you should have with this text. You needed to make it more clear why this fic is so bad, be that through quotes or agent reactions.
Explaining what vore was right off the bat could have helped. The story you used was okay, but for something like vore you need to be blunt.
I enjoyed the first few paragraphs, don't get me wrong. But this could have really been improved had you just set it aside until you had the time to really flesh it out.
Also, there are no centaurs in Kingdom Hearts.