Subject: My turn...
Author:
Posted on: 2008-08-18 17:48:00 UTC

Dearest fangirls and fanboys,

I owe you a debt of gratitude. While I'm surprised you have the cranial wherewithal to read my books, let alone write fanfiction about them, I am very happy that you have. Regardless of what you pounded out on your keyboard while you were watching TV, you have made me a very wealthy woman. I will spend the money you used on my books to promote better literacy and reading comprehension in the public schools, so your like does not surface again.

In addition, your fanfiction is so miserably inept that my writing looks infinitely better the more you try to mangle it. Anyone who didn't like my books the first time around will now think I'm Voltaire in comparison to your literary excretions.

However, I cannot allow my canon to go unprotected. Please be patient while your fic is exterminated. Thanks you.

PPCers,

Have at it.

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